[Intro – clanking tools + steam hissing + dwarves humming a hi-ho remix] The N.S.A. lab was alive. No Strings Attached Dwarves in yellow shirts and blue jeans turning scrap into miracles. [Verse 1 – Lab Montage] Dwarves hammered and welded under White-Apple mirror links glowing bright “Hi ho, hi ho, we’re upgrading the fight tonight” Prince and Rapunzel worked side by side with potions and steampunk parts Frosty’s voice crackled through the mirror — “Frogwarts knowledge for your hearts.” Snow checked in from the White-Apple Kingdom, voice warm but distant “Keep building. The Queen’s shadow is still watching, persistent.” [Verse 2 – Prince & Rapunzel Upgrades] Prince stepped into the prototype rig, overthinking every wire and gear The machine whirred, steam hissed, and suddenly he transformed with a clear “I Row-Bot,” he announced in a modulated voice, half proud, half mortified Oars for arms, flotation pods, grappling hooks — slightly useful, slightly terrified Rapunzel laughed and stepped into her own rig with a wink Her hair uncoiled like living cables, extending fast in a blink She became Hair-Straightener — swinging, grabbing, reaching with perfect control “Finally,” she said, hair whipping a tool across the room, “something useful for the soul.” [Chorus – dark humor upgrade chaos] N.S.A. lab pumping out upgrades left and right Row-Bot and Hair-Straightener testing their new might Tin-Men — quirky little wooden assistants, Pinokie-Groot inspired and small Scuttling around fixing everything, answering every call Woodcutter sat in the chair, stump still raw from the RatRod fight The Tin-Men swarmed him, welding, enchanting, making it right A multi-purpose magic steampunk Swiss-Arm-Axe clicked into place Woodcutter flexed it — “Well… guess I’m the Winter Woodsman now. Ace.” [Verse 3 – Filler & Tease] Grinch's voice came through the mirror — calm and low “Mrs Claus… she was going back for her kids once, you know. Santa knew. He wanted her to find them. He failed to find his own son. That guilt ate at him. Changed him. Made him the smiling corporate one.” The lab fell quiet for a beat — pieces slowly connecting in the dark Hansel and Gretel exchanged a look — something ancient starting to spark [Bridge – spoken, adult dark humor] Prince (Row-Bot) tested an oar-arm and nearly knocked over a shelf “I Row-Bot… this is going to take some getting used to… myself.” Rapunzel (Hair-Straightener) wrapped a strand around his waist with a grin “Relax, genius. At least you’re useful in water now, my sin.” Ariel watched from the corner, eyes distant but determined Her own upgrades waited — Fish Girl tech being prepped and refined “Sea Fled Kingdom needs its queen,” she said quietly, voice steady and true The crew nodded — everyone had their mission, everyone had their cue. [Final Chorus – hopeful, building momentum] N.S.A. upgrades rolling out — Row-Bot, Hair-Straightener, Swiss-Arm-Axe shine Tin-Men scurrying, White-Apple tech flowing through the line The Guardians grow stronger, multiple arcs running side by side The revolution isn’t one front… it’s everywhere at the same time. [Outro – clanking tools + howl + laugh] Yeah… The lab was humming. Woodcutter had a new arm. Prince was Row-Bot. Rapunzel was Hair-Straightener. Ariel was gearing up. And the Grinch? Was waiting in the north. The FairyVerse wasn’t waiting anymore. It was upgrading.
