I just want love... But maybe that ain't for me. Maybe it never was. I dunno. I just want love—but I don’t think I’ll ever have it, Can't even remember how, my mind’s all static. If I meet someone, they run when they see the real me, Say I’m a great guy—then ghost like they never knew me. Can’t blame 'em, really—yeah, I’m weird, little twisted, Said it with a grin, but inside, I feel distant. Crazy side? Yeah, I carry that too, Ain’t no sense in lying, that mask broke through. Ain’t got much in my life they’d call "worth it," Got silence in my chest and a past that’s still burnin'. Don’t talk much—nah, I keep to myself, Don’t go outside, don’t care for the help. I can't hold my heat like a pet store holdin’ Magilla Gorilla, Wild thoughts in my head, and nobody realer. Maybe I forgot how to fight, Or maybe I still can... Just can't see it in the night. I just want love, But maybe I’m not the kind you keep. I just want peace, But these thoughts don't let me sleep. Ready to vanish—fade into the trees, Disappear for a while, just let me breathe. But I’m broke, I’m tired, can’t even afford to eat, So why would anybody wanna walk this road with me? I’m a fuck-up—only thing I’m good at, Tried my best, but it always loops back. Almost 42, ain’t got what I thought I’d have, Just pain, some games, and a worn-out laugh. Games don’t hit the same—they just kill the time, People? Nah—I avoid 'em like landmines. Maybe it’s me... maybe I’m the rot, I try to change, but I don’t know what I got. I can't hold my heat like a pet store holdin’ Magilla Gorilla, Wild thoughts in my head, and nobody realer. Maybe I forgot how to fight, Or maybe I still can... Just can't see it in the night. I just want love, But maybe I’m not the kind you keep. I just want peace, But these thoughts don't let me sleep. No mother—she left when I was just nine months. Used to dream I’d have one. Watchin' other kids get hugs I never felt. Grandma stepped up, but I was too young to tell. Jealousy burned, I wore it like a second skin. Still lookin’ for something I ain’t found within. My teeth are wrecked, my face ain't a prize, Girls I like don’t see me, and the ones who do? Lies. Tried that dating thing—it just ended wrong, Didn’t want the person—just didn’t wanna be alone. I just want someone, Someone to say, “It’s okay. You’re not done.” Someone to stay, not walk away, Someone to know me and still choose to stay. But it looks like it’s not gonna happen… Maybe I’m just too far gone for the magic. I can't hold my heat like a pet store holdin’ Magilla Gorilla, Wild thoughts in my head, and nobody realer. Almost 42... Still don’t know what I’m worth. Still tryin’ to make peace with this earth.
