Roll up drunk to the function— Whole damn world knows we’re up to somethin’. Pissed as fuck... who gives a shit? Talk that shit—then we take your bitch! Who invited us? — FUCK KNOWS, MATE! Showed up pissed... and two hours late! Kick that door—LET US IN! Fuck it, boys... WE’RE DOIN’ IT AGAIN! Walk in dressed like clergy— bottle tucked under the cassock. Sunday service finished... now the confession queue is catastrophic. Lipstick on the collar; fingerprints across the vestment. Apparently, absolution comes with extracurricular assessment. Divorce lawyer drinking neat— swears the photos were fabricated. Kneels down with a marriage problem... leaves complicated. Councillor’s wife arrives composed— immaculate and diplomatic. Fifteen minutes behind the curtain... suddenly, democracy gets acrobatic. Phone buzzing. Pills rattling. Cabbie doing ninety through the city. Three missed calls. Two wedding rings. One text saying, “Bring the pretty one with me.” Priest shoes on the dashboard; clerical shirt half undone. Confidentiality gets difficult... when everybody’s having fun. Educated, medicated, decorated— reputation regulated. Monday morning: boardroom polished. Friday night? Completely unaccredited. Confessions getting graphic... getting frantic... getting oddly specific. Half the booth needs counselling— the other half gets fucking biblical with it. Roll up drunk to the function... Roll up drunk to the function... Roll up drunk to the function... Roll up drunk to the function like I'm Tiger woods, Same shit, different day, Vanilla cracker in the hood! Got so much charm in my jargon, always leave her breathless, Im raw dogging college girls - bitch im fuckin' reckless! Reckless? Really - nah Im a really charitable guy - what's with the strife? 18 ways to please her, yeah homey, I'll donate my sperm directly in your Wife! Mr. Sloth, Mr. Role model, Mr. Im the one you fuckin' karens fear! Mr. Wreck your marriage, Mr. Texas, Mr. fuckin' Faultier, Mr. average looking mother fucker it would appear, Mr. I got all these fuckin' 10s gazing at my cock ...like headlights to a dear! Every fucking thing I spit is deliberate, leave your brain in a blur Fuck your western European politics, I'll teach your fuckin kids Slurs! Sloth Time baby, high as shit as she call me daddy, We've been fuckin six hours straight, yah im railing addy! She's a fan...with fake tits and spray tan, Single mom, still lactating — got that milk on demand, She said, “I love it when you say your name right after something bad,” So I fucked her in the ass so hard, she can barely stand, Then autograph her forehead with my sperm... cause she’s my biggest fan.
