[Intro] Yo— They called me in at nine, with the blinds all closed, Two managers staring like I broke the code. I said, “Before you judge, let the record show…” I had one little drink and a two-step flow. Wait! [Verse 1] I walked in calm with my coffee and tie, They said, “Explain that dancefloor alibi.” I said, “Which part? The bar or the beat?” They said, “Both, and why were you moving your feet?” I said, “Listen, boss, don’t twist my mission, It was cross-team bonding with rhythmic precision. One glass, no mess, no bad ambition, Just stakeholder warmth in a social condition.” She said, “You invited them out?” I said, “That’s collaboration.” He said, “You were dancing?” I said, “Employee motivation.” They said, “It looked romantic.” I said, “False interpretation, That was agile networking with hip rotation.” [Pre-Chorus] I didn’t break policy, I broke into groove, Quarterly targets made my shoulders move. No scandal, no trouble, no office crime, Just a little cha-cha after overtime. [Chorus] It was just networking, don’t call security, Team-building energy, corporate maturity. One drink, two steps, three managers mad, Now I’m in a meeting like I did something bad. It was just networking, don’t write me up, I raised morale with a plastic cup. No love, no plot, no secret fling, Just LinkedIn vibes and a dancefloor swing. [Verse 2] Mister Wood said, “Why’d you buy the round?” I said, “To lift engagement when the mood went down.” Mister The Big One said, “Why’d you spin her twice?” I said, “Because the DJ dropped something nice.” They had a folder marked “Risk,” With screenshots printed like a legal disk. I said, “That photo’s blurry, that angle lies, I was dodging spilled mojito and fluorescent lights.” They said, “You smiled.” I said, “That’s client care.” They said, “You laughed.” I said, “That’s office flair.” They said, “You danced close.” I said, “Not too near, There was a chair, a bag, and a chandelier.” [Bridge] HR walked in with a serious face, Said, “Please describe the salsa space.” I said, “Left foot, right foot, no disgrace, I kept six inches of professional grace.” They said, “Was it fun?” I said, “Unfortunately.” They said, “Was it planned?” I said, “Not officially.” They said, “Would you do it again?” I said, “Conditionally… Depending on budget and team synergy.” [Chorus] It was just networking, don’t call security, Team-building energy, corporate maturity. One drink, two steps, three managers mad, Now I’m in a meeting like I did something bad. It was just networking, don’t write me up, I raised morale with a plastic cup. No love, no plot, no secret fling, Just LinkedIn vibes and a dancefloor swing. [Verse 3] Now I’m making slides for my own defense, “Dancing with colleagues: strategic sense.” Page one: morale. Page two: retention. Page three: no romantic intention. I got charts, I got graphs, I got witness quotes, “His moonwalk improved interdepartmental notes.” The CFO said, “What’s the ROI?” I said, “Four smiles, two laughs, and one high-five.” They said, “Final words?” I said, “Gladly, chief, This whole investigation brought me grief. But if teamwork dies when the music plays, Then cancel the Christmas party for the rest of our days.” [Final Chorus] It was just networking, don’t call security, Team-building energy, corporate maturity. One drink, two steps, three managers mad, Now I’m in a meeting like I did something bad. It was just networking, don’t write me up, I raised morale with a plastic cup. No love, no plot, no secret fling, Just LinkedIn vibes and a dancefloor swing. [Outro] So yes, I danced. Yes, I paid. Yes, the conga line was poorly displayed. But before you judge my after-work thing— Check the KPI on the dancefloor swing. Corporate!
